Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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