Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
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