so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
