i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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