It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
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