not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
