Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
