Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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