let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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