i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
