and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
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