Christians are straight up FREAKS
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
