at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Randomize
