She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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