Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
