i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
