Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
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