honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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