You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize