ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
