I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
