remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Are we still banned from the library?
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
