WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
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I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
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you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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