Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Randomize
