i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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