i don't like sucking hair
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
