we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Farmville is her only friend.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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