It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
