My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
