yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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