Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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