her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
