I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
