mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
