what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
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