All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
