I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
