i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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