...so i touched it.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I need moral support for this bender
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
You've changed since you got that strap on
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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