I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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