apparently the secret to your success is patron
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Will exercising make me less horny?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
