Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
