I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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