The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
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