The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Where is the hickey?
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
