the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
