I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
