# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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