Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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