But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
