i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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