White coat. Heels.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
